CSO LtCmdr Raqiin sh'Hruvek

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CSO LtCmdr Raqiin sh'Hruvek

Postby Shawna F » Fri Mar 14, 2014 8:45 pm

Stardate 11403.13

Raqiin sat, cross-legged with her chin in her hands, in front of the transporter. She’d lost track of just how long she had been there, and it didn’t really matter to her. Her reports were terse but informative, promptly written and logged. Now…now there was time. In a way, she could argue that she was most certainly doing her job, even if it looked like she was staring off into space.

Silvia—what the crew had taken to calling the silver being in the general shape of a typical humanoid female—was still a mystery. And after what happened yesterday, she might always remain that way. Maybe if they come back, maybe if they send probes out in the same way, recreate the conditions…

She didn’t have to be dead. It was difficult to say just how she had been alive, in fact, and that was only part of the reason Raqiin secluded herself as she had. Silvia had created a form out of the transporter, took her energy and altered it so that solid matter could materialize where there had been none before. Had Silvia understood so much more than she knew how to communicate? Had the form she took been on purpose, to be something familiar? It was difficult to imagine the entire thing being pure accident. Raqiin had annoyed the engineers, and vice versa; the constant stream of ‘well technically’ to combat her layman terminology and basic understanding to the transporter system tested her patience. Perhaps a transporter technician could better figure out some of the puzzles Silvia left in her wake, but the entire idea had enchanted Raqiin, tickled her underlying desire to study and record new life.

New life that may or may not have been extinguished. How would they ever know now?

There was certainly hope that her energy was still out there, somewhere. That, under the right conditions, maybe she could reform herself once more. But the descriptions from Ensign sh’Tolar and Captain Griffiths, paired with the dramatic explosion of the shuttle, put that hope into question. This was easier, to isolate herself from emotions that were strong enough that they couldn’t be ignored, to focus on the questions left behind instead of the what ifs of the future.

But the loss, of an extraordinary being who could have revolutionized the definition of biological life as they knew it, of a person with the will to discover and explore and understand, couldn’t be escaped on the floor of the transporter room.

Maybe she was dwelling too much. Maybe she should—no, not let go, but stop moping and staring and doing nothing. Too much nothing, and she could have her mind work while she actually did something useful, right? Maybe she should just go back to her quarters and check her mail. One of her mothers might have sent an early birthday message. Or her roomie some Fed Day well-wishes.

Something to focus on other than the melancholy hanging around the ship. Something other than her own frustrations. Any of it would be better than letting her mind get lost in ion storms long since behind them.
Last edited by Shawna F on Thu Dec 15, 2016 2:33 am, edited 4 times in total.
CSO Lt Raqiin sh'Hruvek - USS Bremen NCC-12428
XO LtCmdr Vikram Baudin - USS Sentinel NCC-79088 / S.T.A.R. Taskforce Sigma

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Re: SCI Cadet Raqiin sh'Hruvek

Postby James Greenman » Fri Mar 14, 2014 10:29 pm

That was a really wonderful, insightful log Shawna! I think you're going to fit in nicely here. :D
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Re: SCI Cadet Raqiin sh'Hruvek

Postby Aoibhe Ni » Fri Mar 14, 2014 11:37 pm

Agreed. Loved it.
Thank you for giving such thought to a mission you only saw the tail end of.

Can't wait to get to know Raqiin better.

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Re: SCI Cadet Raqiin sh'Hruvek

Postby Brian Bailey » Tue Mar 18, 2014 8:13 pm

I liked reading this. Fun way to get to know the character.

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Postby Shawna F » Tue Mar 25, 2014 9:59 pm

6 years ago...

Trees. The station she had wound up on (stuck on, but she wasn't going to say that) had the fortune of carrying an arboretum, part for research from some of the eccentric medics she'd bumped into, part as a place of otherwise calm relaxation for visitors and staff alike. There wasn't anything like that on the cargo ship she'd been stuffed into, nothing but the leafy vegetation some of the crew had chosen to eat. She knew of plants, of botanical wonders that stretched to the sun and covered the grounds of other planets, filling their soil with water- and nutrient-sucking tendrils, had even seen a few images before in her studies, but nothing beat seeing a tree in person.

Every color and every size, filling the room with the soft rustle of leaves, subtle but complex scents, from the smallest blade of grass to the trees whose tops reached for the ceiling. There was nothing even remotely like this on Andoria, not with all the ice, the inhospitable-to-most environment.

Raqiin laid a hand experimentally on cool bark, rough ridges, then reached up to pointy green leaves, much softer, pliant. She might have been interested in life that was more, well, alive, with heartbeats and blood and capacity for thought even on its most basic level, but it was still life, vibrant and thriving. Her fingers brushed velvety flower petals, taking in the aroma akin to perfume. It wasn't quite like being on another planet where everything grew as nature willed it, but it was close enough for now. She squinted up through branches against simulated sunlight, tried to imagine a cool breeze, the--pollen, wasn't it?--floating along, and insects waiting to collect.

She'll make planetfall soon enough. She knew this to be true. And maybe that planet would have sandy deserts or warm glassy oceans or forests thick enough to blot out whatever stars it spun around. For now...

For now, she laid a hand to her stomach against the low growl it sounded out. Good job paying more attention to trees than to yourself, Raqiin. She'd return, ask if anyone needs a hand doing whatever needed to be done around the arboretum, but not until she got something filling to eat. Maybe she'd even try a salad.
CSO Lt Raqiin sh'Hruvek - USS Bremen NCC-12428
XO LtCmdr Vikram Baudin - USS Sentinel NCC-79088 / S.T.A.R. Taskforce Sigma

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Re: SCI Cadet Raqiin sh'Hruvek

Postby James Greenman » Wed Mar 26, 2014 1:53 am

Really fantastic log, Shawna. I love learning more about our newest crew member. :)
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I may or may not have been eagerly awaiting April

Postby Shawna F » Tue Apr 01, 2014 3:46 pm

Approximately 18 years ago...

She had never seen thavan cry so hard. He wept and yelled incoherently such that the ice vibrated with his grief, inconsolable and wracked with such an empty pit inside that it made Raqiin's antennae curl and flatten as much as they could. She sat against the wall of the sleeping area, a meager distance from the commotion, clutching a small stuffed toy, while shreya silently tried to calm him. It wasn't effective, not with how much she hurt inside as well.

Raqiin focused, or at least tried very hard to focus, on petting the soft, synthetic fur of the alicorne, stroking its mane and clutching nervously to a leg with small fingers. Charan had gotten it for her before he left. Before he left and now wouldn't come back. She wasn't trying to eavesdrop, but it was hard to miss. It had started with thavan acting strangely, as if something far away had snapped. Shreya soon followed when she noticed his distracted state. And, eventually, zhavey came home with drooping antennae and a quiet voice. Zhavey had to wait for information to travel to her from the Guard; she didn't have any telepathic connections like thavan and shreya did. And the Guard was more willing to inform someone who was more Andorian just because they filled the Guard ranks, unlike the passive Aenar. Someone who wouldn't know unless she was told--told that charan's ship had been destroyed in battle, that all hands were lost. That there wasn't much left to bring home.

And thavan wailed.

Even at a precocious six years old, Raqiin understood some of the realities of war. She understood the basic concept of death, something learned early on in the harsh environment and with so many young men and women encouraged to join the Guard. And hers was hardly the only family that had an emotional upheaval. People they knew, some were mourning. And more would be mourning today. But despite it all, she tried to make it all okay, make the pain she couldn't block out invisible. Charan had to come home. And that was that. He would heft her up on his shoulders once the stupid war was over, and he'd buy her favorite sweet treat, and he'd tell her stories and teach her more life lessons, and he would feel warm and happy and block out anyone who wasn't having a good day. And he would feel like love. And the family would feel like love when they sat down for a meal. They would be whole again.

She didn't know how long someone had been crouched there in front of her until her own cloud moved aside enough for her to see. Zhavey had taken notice of her. She was angry, beneath the hurt, but zhavey was good at keeping her emotions inward, so all Raqiin had to go on was whatever wasn't a horrible black hole in her head. The anger stuck out, in that case.

"Have they talked to you yet?"

Zhavey made a nod to the spectacle that was her other parents even though the motion was hard to make out with Raqiin's bad eyes. Her voice was still serious, the way it always came out, but not as stern. There was a softness that didn't often make an appearance. Raqiin buried half of her face in the alicorne and gave a very shallow shake of her head. The flare of anger intensified enough that Raqiin could feel it, but nothing so much as twitched on zhavey's face. At least, not that Raqiin could tell.

"Do you understand what's happened?"

Raqiin's face screwed itself up, but she nodded, very slowly. She understood--but she also knew that she couldn't imagine life without charan, so she simply could not accept what she heard.

"Do you want to get out of here?" Zhavey didn't bother letting Raqiin even fomulate some kind of answer, arms reaching out to gather her up, alicorne and all. There had never been any rift between her and zhavey, but it was still uncharacteristically warm of her. And warm she was, warm clothing and warm skin for Raqiin to curl up against. Safe. Raqiin was lifted and cradled, and they were halfway to the doorway when shreya's telepathic voice cut in.

~Where are you going?~ It wasn't quite hysterical, but close enough to make Raqiin bury her face completely in zhavey's shoulder. The material was well-worn and scratchy, but in a pleasant way that almost tickled her nose.

"Out," zhavey all but growled. Raqiin could feel it rumble.

~Don't--~ The telepathic voice caught itself, and the words came verbally instead, weary, placating. "You should be here. With us. We will weather this as a family."

"When he's worn himself out. The atmosphere in here is too oppressive."

Shreya was caught between her remaining husband and her wife and child. Panic began to wind up, a touch of fear, a dash of flustered frustration. Even if Raqiin hadn't felt it, it seemed all too obvious in tone. "Don't you take my shei away."

The anger burst forth viciously. "Then you should remember you have a shei to begin with! Or were you just going to let her hide away playing pretend over this until you were ready? None of us are ready! But I guess only one of us has decided to be a parent and a widow at the same time today." Only thavan's horrifying moans echoed through the rooms, a hush fallen between the women. Satisfied that she'd made her point, zhavey turned on her heel and carried Raqiin outside. Away from the emotional noise. Where she could start to sort out her own feelings instead of being overwhelmed by others. Where they could talk, or not talk, in a more stable environment.

The farther they got from the noise, the emptier Raqiin felt. Like a weight lifting, her eyes could finally let the backlog of tears flow. And zhavey held her until Raqiin had cried herself into an exhausted, fitful sleep.


[[Andorian dictionary time! Since I go with the whole Andorians have four genders to make a family thing, and because this is from the limited perspective of a child about her parents, it kind of requires some special language. Praise be to Memory Beta always.
Thavan - her Aenar thaan father
Shreya - her Aenar shen mother
Charan - her Andorian chan father
Zhavey - her Andorian zhen mother
Shei - shen daughter]]
CSO Lt Raqiin sh'Hruvek - USS Bremen NCC-12428
XO LtCmdr Vikram Baudin - USS Sentinel NCC-79088 / S.T.A.R. Taskforce Sigma

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Re: SCI Cadet Raqiin sh'Hruvek

Postby Aoibhe Ni » Wed Apr 02, 2014 5:54 pm

Wow, Shawna.
You write an ensemble cast so damn well. Nice writing, indeed.

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Re: SCI Cadet Raqiin sh'Hruvek

Postby James Greenman » Thu Apr 03, 2014 3:08 am

Agreed, absolutely stunning writing. I can't waitto see what you bring to the competition in April! :D
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JOINT LOG with Aoibhe

Postby Shawna F » Tue Apr 15, 2014 7:47 pm

Stardate 11404.15

Raqiin frowned towards the Captain. Then she turned back to her little companion. "Has he told you why he started talking to you?" she asked gently "We might be able to help him if he talks to the Captain."

Laney scrunched up her nose at the notion of Captain Griffiths speaking to her friend. "He can't talk to the Captain, silly. The Captain's not little enough."

"So he can only talk to you because you're...little?" Raqiin had considered that perhaps Laney was more sensitive to the alien in trouble, but she'd never heard of a telepath being only able to connect to children before. "Well," she started again, trying to dash the confusion from her voice, "then that makes your help extra important. We're not trying to hurt him; we just don't know he's there and how we're hurting. If he can tell you how we can help, I think we'd all be in better shape."

Laney shrugged with her whole body. "He is a magic ghost," she explained, using the tone of voice she had often heard her mother use when explaining something vitally important to her. In one so young, it seemed wholly out of place, "...and he is stuck in the mud. He was happy when he found me, we played lots of hide-and-seek, but now he's sad all the time. He says lots of things I don't understand." She shrugged again and looked in the direction of the bare wall once more. "I'm talking to my other friend," she explained patiently to thin air. Pointing at Raqiin she added "She's right here... yes she is. Yes she is. Yes she is...!"

'Magic ghost'. Right. While Raqiin might have a gentle, tender touch with the kid, knowing there's only so much she can understand so everything else gets explained through child logic, the situation was beginning to frustrate. But the argument with thin air, that got her attention. "He can't see me." Just like Raqiin couldn't see it. Maybe...maybe it had to do with the quantum fissues, then. They couldn't see him, and he, likewise, couldn't see them. Yet there was enough bleedthrough to know that one another was there. Which meant they really needed to figure out how to close them. There was data on that somewhere, wasn't there?

Except there was Laney. Maybe it wasn't a telepathic projection? Maybe it was, well, like a magic ghost, where he had slipped into some kind of--some kind of frequency?--that Laney could see. What if, in turn, Laney had appeared to this alien, on his ship, wherever he was, whatever dimension or parallel universe he might be in, and she was the ghost instead? Maybe he's been blaming Laney for problems because he literally can't see anyone else or the Bremen. "Laney?" she started with a gentle touch to the girl's shoulder to reel her out of the argument with air. "Can you remember some of the big words you didn't understand? Could you ask him for me if he knows anything about," and here she enunciated clearly and slowly, "closing quantum fissues?"

Laney skewed up her lips and thought. She looked up at her mother who was talking with the Captain. Finding no attention there she looked between Raqiin and the magic ghost. "Can you close quarter fishes?", she asked, all seriousness. She paused for a moment and looked over at Raquiin once more. "He says No."

The try was cute enough to make her giggle, but she supposed that was too much to ask a child. All of the technical jargon that would be required to properly convey something on that level even made her own head spin and her tongue tied. But as far as Raqiin could tell, the only way to properly communicate with the being on another quantum plane was through the girl. It was starting to sound like more research was needed to get anywhere with this. Once the fissures were closed, they wouldn't be entangled anymore, right? "Okay. Thank you for helping me out. You know one more thing you can do? He's been getting pretty upset lately, huh? I bet you can keep him nice and calm. Tell him you know people who are going to help as long as he stays put. And maybe you can play some games."

Laney sighed deeply in that over-exaggerated way children given an important job do, and nodded once. "We can draw pictures," she suggested, pulling her drawing PADD closer once more and tapping a large icon to bring up a new blank screen. Then she proceeded to ignore Raqiin as she chatted amiably to the magic ghost.

Raqiin nodded at the idea, but her mind was already reeling off elsewhere as she pulled herself away from the child. Whoever the being was, they could try to figure out after the crisis was resolved, even if it was likely they'd never see each other again. (Not that they could see each other much to begin with...) She'd have to explain to the captain her theories and hit up the computer for some ideas how to fix it. Hopefully Laney wouldn't get too terribly upset about losing someone she'd started to consider a friend, odd as he was.
CSO Lt Raqiin sh'Hruvek - USS Bremen NCC-12428
XO LtCmdr Vikram Baudin - USS Sentinel NCC-79088 / S.T.A.R. Taskforce Sigma

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